I feel so validated reading this. I am all that remains of my family of origin (since my 53rd year) which in itself is sad. But it’s my paternal grandparents who loom large in my house. Their books, desk, chair, plants, vases, and most preciously their piano and music books. I haven’t been able to play the piano in years due to rheumatoid arthritis but someone else in my children’s or grandchildren’s generation will have to be the ones that ultimately dispose of the old Clarendon spinet.
Thank you for supporting E. Jean. We have to. We have to vote. We have to vote local, state and national. I worry about our fragile democracy and nation.
Thanks for making me laugh- dead diamonds lost behind a toilet—haha! I have my father’s cremains in a box in my home office and my sister has our mother’s at her house - vaguely disturbing and strange to think of them converted so soon to inert elements as they continue to flourish in our hearts.
I, too love old things and old barns- childhood visits to my relatives’ farm in Watkins Glenn, NY, were my best memories. I can still smell the hay and old oil in the stored old vehicles they had. I have an old lacy dress from perhaps 1890 from their family’s house in town…. I treasure my old books, mishmash old furniture, and even use my silver some times. so relatable…. I’m never downsizing, over my dead body.
cremation gems. Oh, thank God, I read Ask Amy and other email early in my day, often while caffeinating. What i thought i read, at first, was "cremation PENS," Being recycled into a pen" lost; out of ink: chewed by the dog: collecting dust in the car, or sofa, or in some dark corner.. Now that would be a seriously depressing end-of-life plan. And a perfect waste of money.
I loved your story. Fascinating when I see how life and memories are so different when a family is rooted in one place as your is.
We are a family of memories not heirlooms. I think this is because my mother was a WWII war bride from Australia who married my father, a Navy officer, she met during the war.
She emigrated here during WWII after marrying my father. She left everything but her memories in Australia. She was not able to return for 40 years.
They settled in Southern California. Dad's family was poor and lived in Virginia. We did not travel to see them. Any heirlooms on either side were left in Virginia and Australia.
Stories and memories abound from their early years and those will live as long as I live and then fade away.
Thank you again for another thought provoking story.
I ,too, have inherited the 200-year-old farmhouse of my childhood, along with generations of heirlooms and antiques. A museum I visit each day, inhabited by various muses and ghosts of the family writers and artists who came before.
I'm 70 and beginning to think about what to do with (1) the heirlooms that have been passed down to me, and (2) what to do with those as well as the things that are precious to me, but probably no one else will want when I'm gone. My siblings already have plenty of our family's things when our parents dies, and my nieces and nephews don't want family history items.
I love old things…they spark my joy!! And Amy, I just love your writings and those of your contributors. Reading this felt like taking a deep, cleansing breath. I always feel better after reading your newsletter - thank you!!!❤️
Several years ago, after having cleaned out a dear friend's apartment--said dear friend was truly a hoarder--my husband and I have talked about "going Amish." (I might have posted about this before?) I realize that the things that I love(d) are not going to be the things that my children love. Several years ago I unpacked my wedding gown (which I could still wear!!) and said to my children, "I'll still be married to Dad if I move this out." The tricky thing is that I'm the one that has so many of the family memories (insert should shrug emoji here). The lovely husband is the sort that could lean out of the house, whistle, and furniture would come galloping at him. I control what I can and continue to live with the rest.
Wonderful! Sweet to hear! I have asked my cousin Carol Corwin for more info. on her father's side of the family, who have been there for many generations. They have some Welch blood I think... Best to you - I am sure you are enjoying the gorgeous summer!
Oh, Amy! I love this post so much. It's a part of who we are in this season of life called "our sixties" to come to terms with our belongings--in a variety of ways.
I spent most of the covid 2020 months cleaning out our attic. Then I spent 2021--my first year of retirement from a newspaper career--writing a memoir about the stories I found alongside the stuff. It's called: There's a Clydesdale in the Attic: Reflections on Keeping and Letting Go.
I feel so validated reading this. I am all that remains of my family of origin (since my 53rd year) which in itself is sad. But it’s my paternal grandparents who loom large in my house. Their books, desk, chair, plants, vases, and most preciously their piano and music books. I haven’t been able to play the piano in years due to rheumatoid arthritis but someone else in my children’s or grandchildren’s generation will have to be the ones that ultimately dispose of the old Clarendon spinet.
Thank you for supporting E. Jean. We have to. We have to vote. We have to vote local, state and national. I worry about our fragile democracy and nation.
Thanks for making me laugh- dead diamonds lost behind a toilet—haha! I have my father’s cremains in a box in my home office and my sister has our mother’s at her house - vaguely disturbing and strange to think of them converted so soon to inert elements as they continue to flourish in our hearts.
I, too love old things and old barns- childhood visits to my relatives’ farm in Watkins Glenn, NY, were my best memories. I can still smell the hay and old oil in the stored old vehicles they had. I have an old lacy dress from perhaps 1890 from their family’s house in town…. I treasure my old books, mishmash old furniture, and even use my silver some times. so relatable…. I’m never downsizing, over my dead body.
cremation gems. Oh, thank God, I read Ask Amy and other email early in my day, often while caffeinating. What i thought i read, at first, was "cremation PENS," Being recycled into a pen" lost; out of ink: chewed by the dog: collecting dust in the car, or sofa, or in some dark corner.. Now that would be a seriously depressing end-of-life plan. And a perfect waste of money.
I am the keeper of family heirlooms and wonder what will happen to them when I’m gone or who will want them? That will be up to someone else.
Always love reading you - in every form😎❤️
I loved your story. Fascinating when I see how life and memories are so different when a family is rooted in one place as your is.
We are a family of memories not heirlooms. I think this is because my mother was a WWII war bride from Australia who married my father, a Navy officer, she met during the war.
She emigrated here during WWII after marrying my father. She left everything but her memories in Australia. She was not able to return for 40 years.
They settled in Southern California. Dad's family was poor and lived in Virginia. We did not travel to see them. Any heirlooms on either side were left in Virginia and Australia.
Stories and memories abound from their early years and those will live as long as I live and then fade away.
Thank you again for another thought provoking story.
Robin Theilmann, La Mesa, CA
This is gorgeous!
I ,too, have inherited the 200-year-old farmhouse of my childhood, along with generations of heirlooms and antiques. A museum I visit each day, inhabited by various muses and ghosts of the family writers and artists who came before.
https://morningpagemashup.substack.com/p/sketchbook-stories-the-red-couch?r=78mjm&utm_medium=ios
I'm 70 and beginning to think about what to do with (1) the heirlooms that have been passed down to me, and (2) what to do with those as well as the things that are precious to me, but probably no one else will want when I'm gone. My siblings already have plenty of our family's things when our parents dies, and my nieces and nephews don't want family history items.
I love old things…they spark my joy!! And Amy, I just love your writings and those of your contributors. Reading this felt like taking a deep, cleansing breath. I always feel better after reading your newsletter - thank you!!!❤️
Thanks Amy! Each time I read your newsletter, I’m so glad I subscribed.
Several years ago, after having cleaned out a dear friend's apartment--said dear friend was truly a hoarder--my husband and I have talked about "going Amish." (I might have posted about this before?) I realize that the things that I love(d) are not going to be the things that my children love. Several years ago I unpacked my wedding gown (which I could still wear!!) and said to my children, "I'll still be married to Dad if I move this out." The tricky thing is that I'm the one that has so many of the family memories (insert should shrug emoji here). The lovely husband is the sort that could lean out of the house, whistle, and furniture would come galloping at him. I control what I can and continue to live with the rest.
Wonderful! Sweet to hear! I have asked my cousin Carol Corwin for more info. on her father's side of the family, who have been there for many generations. They have some Welch blood I think... Best to you - I am sure you are enjoying the gorgeous summer!
Oh, Amy! I love this post so much. It's a part of who we are in this season of life called "our sixties" to come to terms with our belongings--in a variety of ways.
I spent most of the covid 2020 months cleaning out our attic. Then I spent 2021--my first year of retirement from a newspaper career--writing a memoir about the stories I found alongside the stuff. It's called: There's a Clydesdale in the Attic: Reflections on Keeping and Letting Go.
So yes, you are speaking my language. Love it.
This is sooooo good.